I get off at weekends when I'm wasted. It makes getting off more exciting. When I'm hammered, smashed, plastered, I do stuffs that make blokes go mad. Some I don't remember, they just tell me in the morning and they say they love it.

A whore that wants a bloke who can keep up with my filthy day dreams. Can keep up with my horny mind, telling me how to make a fantasy better and help satiate the ache between my legs with just words. Spur me to touch myself when it get's too much.

The beautiful Me: * I love any food that's sweet * I watch films on weekends when I'm not with a bloke. The handsome You: * Loves watching erotic films * Whispers in my ear * Knows how to make breakfast

5 things you should know about me: ● My strawberry creams love butterfly kisses. ● I wank in the morning, every day. ● I need to have a shag once a week. ● I love buggery. ● My hands always love to touch a ball bag.

I don't like dating in a fancy restaurant when there are too many eyes looking at me and my sweetheart. I can't do what my fingers want me to do. Although my feet helps me sometimes. Looking at my luv aroused is a satisfying feeling.

Whenever a lad hits up on me and asks me where I came from, I always tell them I came from a floating island in Gulliver's Travels. They laugh. Those little bastards don't know it's Laputa. Guess I'll have to change my address, whaddya think?