In my mind, the dinner table can be used for more than just meals. It's the best place to layout my body to be devoured by a gentleman much younger than I am. He is welcomed to eat me out or make a serving of cream pie in my cunt.

Daydreaming for most of the day, I ground myself by going on walks. Even when the weather is down right dreary, I would bundle up and make sure to wear my yellow boots to go out and about. There is beauty in even the greyest skies.

Mates say that I have a piss poor sense of humour for laughing at the most inappropriate times. But there are just some things in life that you need to inject some humour into in order to cope with the situation. Do you feel the same way?

If you want to taste the best fish and chips in town, then you should please me first because I am the one who cooks it. I may not be great in bed, but I am sure as hell I am one of the best when it comes in the kitchen.

The best way to make a hot and sexy lady such as myself fall for you is by bombarding me with sweet and thoughtful messages. I don't give a fuck if they make me cringe. I just want someone to send me something.

I prefer talking to men because they have less drama, and it's easier to get along well with them. This is why people see me as a flirt, but if only they knew my reason for having that closeness with the opposite sex. And if only they knew that I'm i...